I've lost myself - my first post

I am not new to blogging. I was blogging in 1999, before there was even such a term (I think). In 1999 I lived in Chicago, and I was trying to make it as an artist. A painter. A painter! (shaking my head). At the time, I blogged about my experiences in the big city. About my social life. The restaurants. Well, not exactly. I wrote about the panhandler that shook the can of pennies against my face. Against my ear. I wrote about the waitress who threw my change at me; 6 dollars in pennies and nickels, because she didn't think I was going to tip her. hmmm, there's a common theme I never thought about. PENNIES. Strange.

Move ahead to 2005 when I started Grad School in Cleveland, for art history. Art is in my blood. Ha! You can see, I'm not one to choose a lucrative career. Practical? NO!

So this post, is a bit of a ramble. Where have I been that led me to where I am now? Painting. Chicago. Grad school. My PhD dissertation topic (which I never finished - I'll get into that sometime) was about men and women performers in the 1930s, during the Great Depression in America. I've always had a love for portraiture. In this case, my topic focused on portraits of circus, vaudeville, and burlesque performers.

Walt Kuhn, Plumes, 1931, The Philips Collection

Ahhhhhh! I love this. It's beautiful in it's desperation. It's honesty. I haven't looked at this painting in years. LOVE!

Do you see? Portraits are not just physical representations of an individual. Do you like this painting? Most people probably do not. I find it compelling. It's not about the palette, or the "beauty" of the style of painting (well, it can be for some). It's about the emotion within this woman. It's about her experiences. Why was she a burlesque performer during the Great Depression? It might even be about the artist himself. Why does he paint such sadness?

With this blog I will talk more about my life, my art, my goals. Maybe I'll include a little art history. I'm sure I'll talk about my photography.

I'm just trying to make sense of it all.

Come back soon!!